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Posts Tagged ‘God’

I had to quit my day job. After three surgeries on my left eye and a major surgery for torn tendons and a shredded ligament in my left wrist, all within a year, working while recovering from all of it became extremely taxing on my mental and physical health. That, along with a toxic workplace atmosphere, took its toll. Indigestion, lack of sleep, and a growing inability to cope overshadowed my attempts to stay positive and thankful.

When I learned I was facing yet another eye surgery and even worse, another reconstructive surgery on the same wrist (with no guarantee there would be full use, plus the possibility that nerve damage may occur), I prayed long and hard. Always believing in Philippians 4:13– that I could do anything with the help of Christ, I had to confess that this time, I just couldn’t. “Lord,” I sobbed. “I’m sorry. I just can’t do it all one more time. I’m not that strong.”

A peace fell over my shoulders as I heard a whisper, not from inside my head but through my soul. “There is another saying you love, remember? Let go, let God? Then let Me handle it. “

Right. But the reality was I couldn’t make ends meet with just my part-time, second, virtual job. I spoke with my son, who told me how much he could help out for the next three months, so I could take a health hiatus. Bless him! But I was still several hundred dollars short. Again, I went to my knees. “Okay, then, Lord. You have always provided. I trust in You. I am letting go.” I typed up my resignation letter, giving a month’s notice, and scheduled my surgeries. Still, my stomach practiced sailors’ knots.

Then, two days later, after Bible study, I stopped at the mail center in my apartment complex for the weekly check of my mailbox, fully expecting it to be stuffed with junk advertising. But, edged amongst all the ads was an envelope the size of a greeting card. I recognized the city of origin but not the address. Curious, I opened it to find a note from a person I had not heard from in many years. And a check… for the exact amount of what I would be short for two months. The note stated that God had put it on this person’s heart to send me this exact amount. They did not know why, but acted in obedience. Any thanks should be directed to God, not them. The check was dated two days before I had put a pencil to my finances. Before I realized my need, God was busy providing.

The next week, I discovered I was to be paid for the vacation time I never took–almost to the penny of the amount I’d be short the third month I needed for my hiatus.

Now, by being frugal in my spending, I can take this needed time off. I have no idea what doors will open after this, but 2026 looks to be a year of unexpected blessings and surprises. One thing I do know, each one will have God’s nail-pierced handprints all over them.

How about you? If God has blessed you in unexpected ways, I would love to hear about it.

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I drove through a new neighborhood where a year ago nothing but a field stood. Now over fifty houses sat side by side, back to back. The developer had planted a tiny five- to six-foot tree in each front yard. Gardeners carefully packed dirt around each one, then drove stakes in the ground at angles and wired the trunks so they would withstand the North Texas winds and grow straight and tall one day… “Good luck, little trees,” I whispered. “I hope your new owners take care of you.”

That night in my women’s Bible study, one lady spoke about her mustard seed faith and how she had come to the group so we’d help her grow in Christ. My mind flashed back to those little trees in the subdivision. Then, it jumped to Jesus’ parable in the Gospel of Matthew.

He told them another parable: “The kingdom of heaven is like a mustard seed, which a man took and planted in his field. Though it is the smallest of all seeds, yet when it grows, it is the largest of garden plants and becomes a tree, so that the birds come and perch in its branches (13:31-32).

I thought of the times I have seen other neighborhoods with houses that were ten to twenty years old. Some of their trees were now as high as the roofs or higher. Other front yards lay barren. Why? Most likely, all of the newly planted trees the developer had included in the properties’ amenities came from the same nursery. Nursery workers surely nurtured each one for several years to make sure it would reach a sellable height. All seemed prepared to go out into the world. Yet not all survived.

It made me realize that we are like saplings…

We all need each other to bolster, water, protect, and feed us spiritually, so we can all grow. Christianity is a community thing. We are never meant to strive alone. We are a body, a holy people.

Though we may think we have been raised up in our faith, we have a long way to go before our beliefs, rooted in Christ’s love, have reached down far enough to support us. We all have a lot of growing to do. Few of us are large-trunked oaks yet.

Church families, service, and sermons, …these all should feed our faith. But for some, these winds are not warm and pleasant. Instead, downpours of negativity and criticism can drown our tender roots. Winds of change, harsh rules, and misinterpretations of Scripture can bend our small trunks to the breaking point. Some people sit in pews thirsting for love and acceptance, and yet leave parched week after week. Soon they wither. Church hurt is a real thing. I have personally experienced it several times in my life and have witnessed others being driven away or shoved out, often by leaders who should have nurtured them when they were on the verge of breaking.

Those gardeners I saw planting the new trees knew some truths all believers should realize…

During the storms and droughts of life, we can’t rely only on ourselves. No matter where we are in our growth, we need each other. We are called to lift each other up, to hold on to each other in tough times and trials, to provide the strength of mercy and prayer.

Each of us has had some of the same nurturing that led us to faith in Jesus as our Lord, but we may not all receive the same amount after we are planted into the dirt of this world. We need constant nutrition… through the Word, intercessory prayer, and the shared witnessing of the ways that God has blessed us.

We are all growing at a different rate. We might face some intensities of life that our fellow saplings across the street or down the block will not experience. Perhaps they have had loved ones to steadily water and feed their faith. Maybe the sun didn’t beat down on them as much, or the bitter north winds were slowed by the house built behind them. Our task is not to judge or compare but to find ways to help each of us grow.

When it comes to spreading roots deep and growing strong in our faith, we all have a lot at stake.

Who are you being called to bolster today? Where do you need another strong wire grounded in Christ to help you stand tall?

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I felt the slight pull. The tug that makes me grip the steering wheel a bit tighter and apply more pressure to keep the car headed down the road the correct way. For a split second, I lifted both of my hands. Yes, the vehicle began to veer toward the right curb… not much, but enough to make me realize my tires needed to be realigned soon.

Our lives can be like that, right? You feel as if you’re following the straight and narrow, then there is that tug of doubt. Perhaps, instead, it is that stubborn “I need to do this myself, thank you” streak. That thought, “I don’t have the time. I’ll pray later.” Or perhaps, the whisper that tells you, “It’s okay if you miss church. You can worship on your own.” A few more bumps in the road and your faith can veer off to the left or the right.

You can ignore it, or apply more pressure and try to correct things yourself. Like your car, however, if you don’t have a professional make the proper adjustments, it can wreck your day, if not your life. For your car, that professional is a mechanic. For your soul, it is the Holy Spirit who can realign your path to steer back into God’s will. Sometimes, if you run off into a ditch, it requires Him working through a spiritual counselor, just as your car may need a tow truck to get it to the mechanic.

In the case of your car’s steering being off, you take it to a shop you trust to do the job right. For you, take it to the Lord in prayer, whom you can always trust to make it righteous.

So please, next time things seem to not quite be going as they should, don’t tell yourself you will adjust. Instead…

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your pathstraight. Proverbs 3:5-6

http://www.dreamstime.com/stock-photography-road-to-success-concept-image29144642

Let the Holy Spirit guide you to the right form of help. Don’t put it off.

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One thing my walk with the Lord has taught me is that I have free will – a choice. There are times I’d prefer to have Him gather me up into His arms and carry me safely through the minefields in my life while I bury my face into His chest. But more often than not, He guides me step by step, teaching me new lessons along the way.

My thought process for the past several difficult years has been to “choose joy.” It is not an emotion but a conscious decision to alter my thought patterns toward the positive side. To replace fear with faith and trepidation with trust.

But I am human. I am flawed, and my emotions can trip me up. That is when the door to my heart can open, just a crack, which can allow the Liar to whisper into it.

In Psalm 22, which is often considered a prophetic account of Jesus’ suffering on the cross when he said, “My God, why have you forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46), it starts out by revealing the suffering and pain. Then, the mood shifts…

“But you, Lord, do not be far from me.
    You are my strength; come quickly to help me” (verse 19).

When I read this recently, it was as if cold water splashed my chest. I realized that when I cannot alter my feelings on my own, I need to ALTAR them. Take them to God. Lay them at His feet. If I give them to Him, the devil cannot interfere. And what’s more, God will use them to His glory to change my perspective, teach me a lesson, or slowly heal the wound. Maybe all three.

Choosing to ALTAR instead of alter, places the A before the E – the Almighty before emotions.

Another psalm, part of what is recited in the Morning Prayer, is from Psalm 51… “Create in me a clean heart and renew a right spirit within me. Give me the joy of Your saving help again and sustain me” (verses 10,12). I am now praying this daily at the start of my morning devotions.

I have slowly come to realize that I cannot obtain uncircumstantial peace alone. I am in need of a Savior…daily, hourly, moment by moment, who will teach me His ways, and mold my heart, mind, and spirit to His.

Jesus told His disciples not only that He was leaving them peace, but His peace. Not the fleeting emotional peace the world offers. His eternal one that rises above situations and emotions (See John 14:27).

I do not yet exist in that constant, unwavering peace, but I am getting better at achieving it, with God’s help. I cannot rely on my own strength or understanding, and definitely not on my emotions.

WHATEVER YOU FACE TODAY, ALTAR IT. It just may begin to alter you.

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Every morning, I clean my guinea pig’s cage. Not to get too graphic, but since he has lived in it overnight, it gets very messy. Some days, it is simply because guinea pig cages do not come with tiny flushable toilets. So I have to scoop the poop. At other times, he has made a mess beyond the norm. He has tossed hay, overturned a bowl, dragged his bedding across the cage, or really soiled it.

So, I get out the whisk broom, scrub down the plastic floor of the cage, change his bedding and padding, then make sure he has fresh hay, pellets, and water as well as his chewable vitamin. Now I know he will be ready to start the day afresh.

As I performed this daily morning task, with the gurgles of my coffee brewing in the background, I heard that whisper that I knew wasn’t just my thoughts. “You do this because you love him, want to keep him safe and healthy. How much more do I do the same for you?”

Immediately, the following verse came to mind: Because of the Lord’s great love, we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness (Lamentations 3:22-23).

Because I have claimed Christ as my Lord and Savior, I am saved from death and sin. However, my life can become messy at times. Sometimes I make my own mess, but often it is simply due to living in a broken world. Like my guinea pig, I am just trying to exist in my environment.

Being compared to my furry little guy reminded me that I am not as self-efficient as I think. I need help. I need love. I need provisions. I need a fresh start every morning and a righted attitude before I head back out into the world.

One of my morning prayers comes from Psalm 52- Create in me a clean heart, O Lord, and renew a right spirit within me. Spruce me up, dear Lord. Wipe away my sins of yesterday. Forgive me if I made a mess. Equip me with what I need to survive today. Give me my daily bread….

Then I can have my morning coffee!

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The word ever means ongoing, doesn’t it? But what word you put in front of it can make a difference. That word sheds light upon the ongoing question.

courtesy of cd20 unsplash.com

Whatever can imply disbelief or nonacceptance. “Whatever you say…” “Whatever happens…”

However can suggest either a change in thought – “However, I see it differently.” – or an inability to see a change. “However are you going to do that?”

Whenever often has an exasperated sigh hidden in it. I may be done, but who knows when? “Whenever you decide to take out the trash…” “Whenever you go to the store…” “Whenever will things change around here?”

But whoever indicates a belief that someone can do something. “Whoever wants this job can have it.” “Whoever makes an A will be exempt from next week’s test.”

Jesus used this word. He told the religious officials about to stone a woman to death for a grievous sin, “Whoever is without sin, pick up the first stone.” (But He chose not to, instead He forgave the woman and commanded her to go and sin no more.) He told his followers and curious onlookers, “Whoever believes in me shall inherit eternal life.” Not everyone would that day, but one day…

If I say whatever, whenever, or however, then doubt creeps in. But even if I do not know what, when, or how, if I know who, then my question changes from “maybe” to “someone can.” As a Christian, I believe in my soul of souls in the Who. He is all-powerful, almighty, all-knowing, and all-loving. He is the one who died for the sin of the world and rose again, so those who believe can have life everlasting in His eternal kingdom, where there is no hurt, anger, or pain.

And there is one other “ever” I know. No matter what, or how, or even when, I know His love for me is forever. It is for you as well.

Without question, Jesus is the whoever you are looking for in your life, and will be forever more.

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“God gave us two for a reason.” That has been my mantra the past few weeks. The left eye I had surgery on last fall developed a whopping cataract, a side effect that can happen, and of which I had been told very well might… in a year or so. However, it came to be in just a few months.

Because I was still “post-op” in that eye, I had to undergo laser surgery to have a corneal transplant. The doctor explained that my distant vision would no longer require me to wear glasses –for the first time since 2nd grade, some sixty-odd years ago– that part I heard clearly. But that it would be fixed in place so my close-up vision would not be clear anymore, evaded my ears. I’d never had to use readers, so why would I need them now? (I still don’t get that part by the way.)

Initially, I was ecstatic. I could see leaves, details, and colors! Shock, and the deja vu of not seeing out of the eye at all last fall, sent me into a tailspin when I tried to read my phone with just that eye. All fuzzy and out of focus. What was happening? The doctor on call coaxed me off the cliff.

After a long discussion, I decided I didn’t want the same plight to happen to my dominant right eye, the good eye, the eye I can still read with 20/20 clarity. So I canceled the second eye surgery for the tiny cataract that was developing, of which they initially insisted I would need, so my eyes would be “even.”

I decided to go mono-vision, meaning one eye would see 20/30 into the distance without corrective eyewear, and I’d train the other eye to compensate by focusing on things I needed to see close-up. So far, it is working, and I am enjoying not having glasses pressed onto the ridge of my nose.

WHERE HAVE I FOUND GOD IN ALL THIS? I think as Christians, perhaps we need mono-vision. We need to adjust the eyes we are used to viewing the world with and begin to make our dominant vision see what God wants us to see, so we can become what He wants us to be. He sees beyond the moment and beyond the exterior into the heart. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart (1 Samuel 16:7)

We can, and should, retrain our vision. Paul said at the time he saw things dimly, as if in a smudged mirror, but soon he’d see things face to face, the way God sees. (1 Corinthians 13:12)

It will take time, patience, and diligence to shift how we view things. But fuzzing out the negative and bad so we can focus on the good may be the counter-cultural action we all need to practice. Let one eye clearly concentrate on what will happen in the distance when Christ returns, while the other peers into the heart of those we encounter. We might just see ourselves reflected in those God puts in our path–people who are not perfect but need a forgiving Savior.

God gave us two eyes to see for a reason…. perhaps He is also giving us two spiritual eyes, for a reason.

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Photo by Zdeněk Macháček on Unsplash

A routine eye check revealed something I had not envisioned…literally. I had felt something was wrong…eye strain maybe? A new prescription needed? Little did I know I could barely see out of my non-dominant, left eye. All was cloudy, skewed, and fuzzy. I had a hole in the macular at the back of my retina.

So I had surgery. The eye specialist inserted a gas bubble into my eye and I had to keep my head down for days while it positioned correctly to allow the hole at the back of my retina to knit back together. After the surgery was deemed a success, I had to endure the gas bubble clouding my vision for several weeks while it slowly diminished. The eye surgeon had said he couldn’t exactly predict when the bubble would evaporate. It depended on each individual. But it would happen. I had to be patient and follow his instructions.

At first, it was hard to see around this cloudy black thing. I had to really concentrate. But slowly it began to become less of a distraction and more of just an annoyance. Black floaters began to lift off, and I had the urge to swat them like gnats. By the second week, it reduced to a navy blue opaque dot with a blue veil in the center and it lowered in my vision field to somewhere around my lower eyelid, then my cheek, then mouth, then chin. It became the size of a quarter, then nickel, then dime, and then a bead. At last, this morning when I awoke, it was gone.

Where did I see God in all this, other than Him leading me to an excellent eye surgeon?

This bubble represented a sin in my life that I had not yet dealt with because I wasn’t quite sure I had to. Or maybe it was easier to just ignore it. My dominant faith covered it up and compensated…for a while. But deep down I knew something was not quite right. Once revealed by the Great Physician that I had a hole that distorted my perception of Kingdom living, I was in total dismay, and a tad frightened.

God inserted a “bubble” around that sin. At first, it was all I could see. It became so magnified in my life that it clouded everything else. But little by little, God’s mercy worked in my life. I had to be patient and follow His instructions. My attitude and actions began to slowly change. The hole healed, and the sin’s influence and tendency began to diminish. My thought pattern slowly altered and one day I realized it was no longer part of how I saw the world.

For as by the one man’s disobedience the many were made sinners, so by the one man’s obedience the many will be made righteous. Now the law came in to increase the trespass, but where sin increased, grace abounded all the more,  so that, as sin reigned in death, grace also might reign through righteousness leading to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord (Romans 5:19-21).

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I wait for the Lord, my soul waits,
    and in his word I hope;
 my soul waits for the Lord
    more than watchmen for the morning,
    more than watchmen for the morning.
Psalm 130:5-6 (ESV)

Simon and Garfunkel sang about darkness being their friend. It is true that in the middle of the night, there can be a special stillness that can bring peace. But for many, darkness is far from friendly, especially if their emotions hover in a dark place.

The psalmist relates to those who feel uneasy sitting in the darkness. He compares their waiting on God to act on their behalf to a watchman on a lookout tower peering into the blackness. He holds short, quick breaths to stay alert, hoping he doesn’t detect an enemy stealthily sneaking toward the gated community he is in charge of protecting. Come on morning… come on light. Illuminate the landscape so I can see all is well.

And so the watchman waits… so do the many crouched on their beds as tears drip down their cheeks. Or children who cringe at every creaky sound in the house, or the caregiver who is not sure he or she can watch their loved one suffer one more night. The parent waiting for their child to come home, fearing the worst.

Perhaps you are there right now. In the dark. Wait…

Those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength… Isaiah said that. Believe it. Cling to it.

Lips whisper a prayer, “Shine, Jesus, shine on me–the way the dawn brightens the sky. Let me feel the warmth of Your love on my face and shoulders as Your loving strength penetrates every inch of my body. You will let the sun rise every morning, so I know You will lighten my darkness…”

No wonder many start their day praising the Lord. After all, the dawn does finally come, and with it, the promise that God is there and He cares. He was right there in the darkness all along.

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. Lamentations 3:22-23

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11731677_843326022441119_5009069572829748336_oWhere do you find God in your day?  I often find Him in the clouds. (Which is why clouds billow on this site.)

Perhaps it’s  because my father was an amateur meteorologist and through him I came to love the amazing power and beauty of the atmosphere. God knows this, so it is one of the ways He touches me. I have collected “God pictures” over the years. I switch them out as wallpaper on my home computer and they always make me smile, even on the tough days when I feel in a fog or the dark clouds are hovering.

Here area few of them.

1528744_10152751910254322_7775218544257807944_nID-10014140011060018_10206201281935869_4190886433056711074_ngod smiling in the sky580569_667084729976622_1695637681_ncropped-sunrise-over-burleson-0023.jpgstorm-clouds-2-134981298598261vgu god in the clouds

What are your hobbies, joys and passions? Look carefully. You may find God there trying to get your attention so He can tell you He loves you. Don’t let the daily busyness of your world cloud your vision.

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